Dolphins Wide-Out of Here

This is a tale of a major ineptness, and the Dolphins think tanking solves this recent messiness. Even when they get a name like Nate Orchard, they release the player and look like a forger. But when its in front of them they still cannot find, a solid football player who can handle the asinine. Unless it’s someone like Brian Hartline, who owns a Circle K now he’s not on the sideline. Who wants to play for this horror of Chambers? Except for Chris who was one of the decent members.

As has been the trend of the mammal, football playing in gray flannel, we come to the flea market of wide-outs, signed on as dreams and going out as dark clouds. Just like a flash like Ted Ginn Jr., we met your family but hardly knew ya. Then the yard was controlled by a Marshall, who couldn’t catch balls until he went to Chicago.

Then the deep balls went to Wallace, but usually too tall like he was a Oompa Lumpas. Cause of the erratic Tannehill, with a gun toting wife and a throw manual. He caused much calamity cause all he could throw were 5 yards to Landry. And he caught so much that he demanded a new deal. But instead of more money he shredded the teal. And when the Browns called, he picked up and ran. just like LeBron when he went to Cleveland.

Then there was the curious case of Rishard Matthews, who retired this year cause he wasn’t really used. But that wasn’t case when he was a Dolphin. But before the pour started, the Fins said “when”. And then there was the latest departure of Kenny Stills, with a lot of talent but also some ills, that showed in the dirt that was on his knees, when he would kneel, Ross was not pleased.

So the Dolphins cut bait along with a smoke master. That was a gamble by a ESPN sportscaster. Who pretended to be a GM who knew, how to build a franchise anew. And it’s 2019, 20 after Marino. And we have already said to this season, finito.



Where art thou, Dorian?

It’s not just a character from One Life to Live, although it’s contents may create a sieve and it’s not a picture with a last name Gray, or a show about anatomy or some sex expose. This is the latest storm to threaten the South, with the name Dorian and it looks like no slouch.

In fact it’s a Cat 3 which may change to Cat 4, heading to land by a certain mouse hole. Now what happens now and Sunday is unsure, it may center Miami or maybe Melbourne. Where it lands, it will probably pack a punch, with a windy center and an outside crunch. Not like a Nestle Crunch or a Twix, but turning ficus trees to a pile of twigs.

And now Florida is in a state of emergency, of course POTUS knows it’s in the confederacy. Cause he certainly plays to a certain audience, which Florida has with amazing abundance. And he would like to place the G7 and yet being a President is still hard to fathom. He has a lot in common with Dorian. He has a lot of wind and he loves visiting Florida.

And now the citizens are buying up the water, making the stores like a place of slaughter. And the peeps are filling up their gas tank, buying up Hawaiian Rolls and that old favorite, Spam. Not that gross pumpkin concoction, but the regular mold of halting byproduct. 

Hopefully will spared a full blow, and it will dissipate into the ocean floor. And allow us to enjoy the weekend, and give a thought to patriots no longer with us.


Sears not in Amazon transfer portal

For those who don’t know, his name is Jack. He started some games for the Trojan attack. He’s already degreed from Southern Cal, but he’s headed to El Portal, the transfer portal for athletes frustrated, with their playing time dilapidated.  But the headline also prompts a thought about Sears, about a department store and not just quarterback careers.

Do they exist and still make a profit? Or did they regress like their Husky line outfit? I hadn’t heard that brand in some time, until Sears the quarterback went to the back of the line. Of starting and running, handing and throwing, for OJ’s team who drafted Luck without knowing. It all goes to OJ, a noted two person slayer, whose reinvented himself as a fantasy player.

But back to Sears and this transfer portal, do the sell online and this is how you return an order? Cause thats how an older would read, that Sears figured out Amazon after years, or decades or possible millennium, which makes me think of Star Trek continuum. Where some use phasers to start a race only to be twarted by that portal of space, and then it disappears without a trace, the Starship Enterprise with that Captain Kirk face, the one where’s he’s about to go Shakespeare, then pauses his speech to go look in a mirror.

But let’s stop with momentary confusion and instead reflect this players resolution. To go where no man has gone before, to the transfer portal to request a return for one more year of throwing for sport and not to return that Husky ugly shirt.

Chain of Hurricane Fools

Unlike Hurricanes of a different name, this Miami franchise started just the same. With a chomp they’re hopes maybe shattered like the Rolling Stones song on a vinyl platter. The score of this game was 24-20 and of the turnovers, there seemed to be plenty. But if your looking for a recap of the game, follow the people who call Miami to shame.

The ones who said Mark Richt was to blame, and before him was not Golden but a shade of lame. And before that was a Shannon of Randy, that went the same route as electronics and Tandy. The truth it wasn’t the fault of Shalala or the late Paul Dee. It’s that wins against other colleges were no longer free. Because the competition became more fierce. And the best wasn’t Miami just looking in the mirror.

They’ve been looking up for a very long time but the fans hold them to a standard so asinine. As like Dorsey or James, Portis or Sean. Cause getting that talent is as good as gone. Alabama and Clemson come holding more sway and South Florida’s best choose another place to play. Gone are the days of having Uncle Luke, or Nevin Shapiro, even after the rebuke.

Then there’s Jimmy who thought something special even before a 62-7 dismantle. Don’t get it twisted, he got it much better, at the Miami college and not under Shula the mentor. He had his way as well as Erickson, until the Pell Grants undid his game plan. 

And the fans that lament the most, are the peeps who didn’t graduate, or not even a ghost, in the hallowed halls on the U of M campus. And they often don’t speak an unintelligible sentence. Like the second team they’re a pro fan of, playing football in the Republic Banana.

So don’t go apoplectic because of two chomps, and don’t act like a menagerie of chumps. The U may be still successful indeed, but the dreams of dominating must, at last, be let free.

Not Luck of the Irish

He was anything but plucky, and now we know he wasn’t lucky when to MRI to MRI, Andrew Luck knew it was his time. He was a little introspective, than his usual Colombo the investigator. Take that you fantasy football players who drafted a tree who had a few layers. And there were Colts who were the benefactors of knowing they will be quarterbacked by a lot of actors.

They will not measure to the gifts Luck had, like rearing back and rifling to pass to a back. Indianapolis never lined up the team, that Luck could count on like a pigskin seam. Cause he was eaten by Lions and Bears, cause they would eat him like he invaded their lair. And he was never protected like a possible legend, cause his first line of defense acted like duck season was in session.

And then when playing was likely remote, then Curtis Painter would apply a fresh coat. Of passes that often spelled backup, which is why Andrew was drafted first player up. Only to see his given up the fightin, and now whats left is a Texan or Titan, with Watt or Mariotta to win a division, that Luck would walk through with his passes of incision,

And the people that may miss him most of all, are not Colt fans but Dan LeBatard. Making humor of his caveman vernacular and his deep voice heard from miles and miles afar. And his last presser has now came to pass and the Colts are a jalopy that is now out of gas. Unless they are rescued by Jacoby Brissett. If your Colt fans, I wouldn’t hold your breath.

Stand Pat Brian Flores

Right off the top in his presser, Brian Flores made sure there was no second guesser. He understands the position to kneel, is separate from what the men do in teal. And it’s not smacking the military in the face. That media flagellation has been a disgrace. But when you kneel its done in silence. So the lambs will speak and many are liars.

Brian Flores is a man in New York. A man of color you cannot distort. His experiences in stopping and frisking. He won’t be on the sideline making sounds like tsk tsking. But he will motivate when given the chance. His job is to win games and not wallow in chants. So when Kenny Stills was getting wide open, he was listening to Jay Z’s word spoken. Over the speaker while running in practice cause when the kneeling stops, it’s time to take action. And earn his paycheck by exhibiting his skill, by scoring touchdowns and giving fans a thrill.

That wasn’t the case with a coach named Gase, when the Dolphins were playing like in a malaise. And it wasn’t the case with a coach named Philbin when seemed like they played with nary a fin. When coaches found powder on tables, not fields, and when there was too much Richie Incognitos.

Brian Flores seems to have a firm connection, on what is the truth and what is fiction. Like staring at odds 300 to 1, while the favorite is led by Tom Brady’s gun. The one fans have been silenced by for decades. Flores saw first hand what results on pump fakes. While his defense was getting lit up in practice. He can put his studies into game action. We may not compete or maybe we will, against his mentor and the adversarial Bill. Let’s hope Brian’s press conferences, aren’t like Bill’s, bland as molasses.

There may be hope, they will not be the worst. But there’s a long way from hoping and being in first. But seems like we have a leader and chief, welcome Brian Flores, you’re a welcome relief.


Castillo: Whiffs and White Lines

Back in the news comes Luis Castillo, but most do not know him from Juan or Julio. But here in the Fish Pond, he has some allure, owning a 2003 championship blazer. The last the Marlin’s have caught their net but Luis is now rumored to aid and abet.

A drug ring kind of like the story of El Chapo, involving two chaps that use to bat fungo. One was Octavio Dotel, who wore Dodger blue, now looking at pinstripes in a jail cell or two. And another is Luis, who played for the Fish, who may have a boss who calls in hits. Not that Luis could be guilty of that. He once wore Mendoza on his teal hat. However if a hit was needed, he had a teammate. His name was Urbina who many called a cellmate.

But lives were at stake and we should not tease. The boss was linked to shots at Ortiz. Not those David hit over the Green Monster, but at a nightclub while drinking a Foster. Cesar the Abuser is the man that’s accused. And now on the run to a tunnel near you. So keep a low profile like the Marlins have done. They haven’t made the playoffs in practically an eon.

The last time was when Luis was swinging and missing. You could hear the bat almost practically whistling. Even when he became a Met, he never saw a pitch that he couldn’t get. Least he thought so as it traveled the zone, and into a mitt fitted to a Cerrone.  And now he might be caught like a ball at second base. While authorities continue and ongoing chase. Suggestion to Cesar to be just another. Seems like South Florida may be the perfect place.

Where Boles and McKeon may stop by. Former bosses of Luis between the white lines. Where Dawson patrolled and Conine was king. And Perez is still, at least I think. Luis would feel home and somewhat at ease. A bat in his hands is not a weapon, oh please.